Great Expectations: Chapter 60
by Timbereads
Summary: [Written for an English prompt] Dicken's leaves Estella and Pip's relationship somewhat unresolved. Read what happens when Pip recieves a letter from Estella after not corresponding with her for six years.


**Great Expectations: Chapter 60**

It was sex years to the day I saw Estella at Sadis' house that I received the letter. Understandably, my experiences with unexpected notes have led me to be cautious with my reactions. Despite my trepidation with such matters, I could not help but gasp as I read the flowery words.

_Dearest Pip,_

_We have not corresponded in such a while. I realize now that your absence has blighted my life, though I feel I cannot implore you to leave your current affairs._

_I have written with intention in mind. It is my duty as a friend and my own personal want that I inform you that I bore a child eight years ago, though not from my own womb. It is in such the same way I came into the estate of Ms. Havisham._

_It is my desire that you come visit us in London. I do hope that this is not too large a request, but I believe your influence, however small that may be, will be a wonderful thing for my dear daughter to know._

_Yours truly always,_

_Estella_

Of course, I jumped at the chance to see my first love again, if not somewhat suspicious of her abrupt actions. After my dealings with Magwitch and Compeyson, I don't find it strange to first question such random turns of events as this certainly was.

I quickly jotted down the dates included in Estella's note, intending to ask Herbert for a bit of a vacation on those days. I had no doubt in my mind that he'd give me leave as soon as I asked, nor would he be upset if I left for a while. However, if in my strange life I have learned anything, it is that surprises are best avoided when it comes to matters of the heart.

With a bit of a skip in my step, I began to walk the short distance to the telegraph building in the middle of town. The sky has let go its watery bounty the night before; as the sun shined brightly over the marshes, a soft mist could be seen clinging low to the ground. These marshes had long ago lost their repugnance with me. I'd stopped seeing them as passages of unfortunate happenings and realized that, in their own way, they were beautiful. I believe I came to this conclusion after my dealings with Magwitch, though with a bit of help from Herbert. Despite how I tried to deny it, I was inexplicably tied to the long grasses and muddy paths.

As I expected, Herbert quickly replied to my telegram, readily allowing me a short vacation. And so it was set. I was to visit Estella once more, but nothing could have prepared me for what I was about to experience.

The small carriage stopped in front of a quaint brick house, vines crawling up its walls. Drummle may have abused Estella's body, but at least he had the decency to keep her in the same state of luxury she grew up knowing.

The large oak door opened before I could lift my fist, revealing a tiny woman, dressed haphazardly in a wrinkled maid's uniform, her bonnet barely clinging to one ear. Strangely, she didn't seem to be surprised at my appearance, which left me wondering at her somewhat haggard dress.

She led me to a small parlor, sitting me in an embroidered chair before running off. All around me a busy collection of men and women shouted orders and pranced from room to room. I could not even hear myself think from all the tumult around me.

Suddenly, the noise paused, and heads whipped to the stairs where a woman could be seen descending them gracefully. I stood, knowing from my fast beating heart and sweaty palms that it was Estella. A gentle breeze was blowing in from the door the maid had left askew, causing Estella's dress to sway around her knees in such a way I could not help but admire. Even in her older years, she never decreased in beauty.

"Hello, my dear Pip," she murmured.

"Hello, Estella. You're doing well, I trust?"

"Very. Bentley left me with the ability to live comfortably for the rest of my days. And you?"

I was reluctant to tell her of my relative poverty, at least, to her standards. I know she was aware of my past debt, though I doubt she knew more.

"I'm doing well enough," I finally said. To change the subject I asked, "Where is your daughter?"

"My goodness, in all the excitement, I clean forgot," Estella laughed. "Bring Célinne," she told a butler. He nodded before walking out of the room, his Roman nose looking to the sky.

There was a bit of an awkward silence, interrupted by a loud crash and a stream of curses from the other side of the house. Estella looked annoyed, rushing towards the noise. I was left alone once more.

I took the precious few moments I had to quietly observe my surroundings. Looking through a freshly cleaned window pane, I saw a small yard festooned with garlands and lit with candles, though it was the middle of the day. A long table, nearly sinking to the ground from the weight of the food upon it, stretched from one end of the lawn to the other. Hired help was running to and fro, carrying more food or further ostentatious decorations. What in the world was going on?

Estella glided back to my side, following my gaze out the window.

"It is Célinne's first communion today. We're having a bit of a celebration."

I could not help but stare at her genteel face. For some reason, she'd invited me, who she had not seen in six years, to her daughter's most special coming of age event, and she'd neglected to tell me this in her letter. I'd brought no gift, no exceptionally fancy clothing, no great amount of money (this not to say I had such an amount) to impress Estella's friends, and most important, no experience in such an occasion. My sister and Joe could not afford my own first communion, and I was never invited to anyone else's. It seemed as if Estella had purposely invited me to her home to embarrass me.

"I am very much honored to be a part of this special ceremony," I said to Estella, though I looked back out the glass. I sensed her moving to a chair, and I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

"I'm glad you came, Pip," she said to my turned back. "Very glad. This will mean so much to Célinne."

"What have you told her of me?" I asked.

Estella shrugged. "I am sorry to say very little. All she knows is that you're a great man, who puts other people's feelings and aspirations before his own."

I had no idea Estella thought of me that way. Moreover, I didn't know where she got such ideas, since I certainly had never shown such characteristics in her presence.

"That's, er, so kind of you," I stammered. I was about to continue when light footsteps pervaded the house and a small green figure shot like a human cannonball into the rooms, launching itself at my legs. It met my knees with a resounding smack, clinging to them even as I buckled under the force of the impact. When I looked down, a small, quasi-toothless grin looked back up at me. The smile belonged to a girl, dressed in a velvet green dress. She looked about eight, and she bore a startlingly similar face to Estella.

"Célinne! Apologize to Mr. Pip this instance!" Estella bellowed.

I looked back to my first love, laughing.

"Not to worry. I'm alright. She's a feisty little devil!"

Estella smiled weakly as she grabbed Célinne's hand and yanked her off of me.

"What have I told you about strangers?" she said a bit softer. "Especially _male_ strangers?"

"Never approach them, let them approach you," the little girl muttered, staring at her feet. Estella nodded sharply before giving her daughter a bit of a push out the doorway.

"Go play outside, Linna," she called.

We spent an hour catching up before the same peevish butler returned, notifying Estella that her daughter was ready to go to the church. Estella barely acknowledged him, instead telling me to get cleaned up a bit. I did so, choosing the fanciest suit I had before meeting the small family in the parlor. We gathered our things and stuffed ourselves in the rather cramped carriage that transported us to the church where the ceremony was to take place.

The First Communion itself took little time. Célinne walked up to the priest, received her holy wafer, and said a short prayer in the time it takes an average man to get dressed. I assumed we were going to wait for the other five children to complete the rite, but Estella stood and walked out of the church as soon as Célinne came bounding down the aisle. The rest of the churchgoers gave us dirty looks as our entire party of seven or eight noisily stood from our seats and swiftly left the parish.

The party was another matter of course. It seemed Estella had invited any person she'd ever known since birth. More than one hundred people crowded into the small yard behind the house, eating and drinking and being merry. Estella and Célinne were lost in the throng, and I myself soon found a glass of champagne in my hand and a biscuit in my mouth.

It was purely by accident that I stumbled upon Célinne, playing with a doll in the house. I had been sent by a harried maid to look for more apple pie, though I had no more idea where it was than she. As I was rummaging in the kitchen, I heard a small giggle from under the stairs. Célinne was talking quietly with a rag doll. I abandoned my futile search to kneel beside the small girl.

"Hullo there," I said, smiling. Célinne looked up at me, no grin fixed upon her somewhat angry countenance.

"Mother says I'm not to speak to you."

I was taken aback. Why would Estella tell her daughter to ignore me if she herself had invited me for the very purpose of meeting the girl? It made no sense at all.

I reentered the party, steely searching for Estella. I found her, laughing softly at a very…shall we say, full-with-drink man. I squeezed myself in front of the red-faced buffoon, paying no heed to his drunken protests. Estella just looked back into my glare.

"Why did you tell your daughter never to speak to me?" I asked with my teeth tight against one another.

"So that you wouldn't make her feel," she said simply.

"I'm afraid I don't understand."

She sighed.

"When you first met me, Ms. Havisham had successfully kept me from feeling. And then you came barging into my life, and I found I no longer had the talent. I have thus far raised Célinne in much the same was Ms. Havisham did me, and I've found that it is for the best. Why subject my daughter to the pain of life when I can protect her from it?"

"Because everyone has to feel!" I cried.

"My daughter does not. Neither do I."

"But why would you invite me here if you were going to have me ignored?"

"I thought you'd like to meet her."

With that, she left my side, drifting back into the crowd of people, leaving me staring after her.

I never did see Estella again. I heard she successfully raised Célinne to be as much of a tiger as she was. I had no doubt in my mind that the girl was destined for great things, though it saddened me that I could not be a part of them. I suppose it was at that moment as Estella turned her back on me that I realized that I can't be a part of _every_one's great expectations.


End file.
